Daze of My Life: How Sweat It Isn't

Daze of My Life
How Sweat It Isn't
by Kenneth B. Lourie

Or rather hasn't been. Which suits many, well, maybe some, like my wife, Dina. She hates the heat and much prefers the cold (present company excluded). But like many others I'm sure, she often feels cheated when winter springs into summer, overnight it seems, with nary a day in between to savor the temperate moment. And before you can stop worrying about freeze warnings, you're hearing one of the all-too familiar words of summer: Humiture, the opposite of wind chill: The combination of heat and humidity that makes it feel like even hotter.
On that day, no more do we wish for warmer weather. It's here. Now what are we going to do about it? Complain, that's what, about how once again us Washingtonians never experienced our rite of spring and instead find ourselves summering (or is that simmering) sooner rather than later. And so we sizzle and have to condition the air: at home, at work, in the car; everywhere, in a never ending attempt to stay cool and not get hot under the collar, or anywhere else, either.
But it's pointless. The heat is here (or will be soon enough) and there's nothing any of us can do about it. And of course there will be some eardrum-cracking thunderstorms to hear and some nighttime lightning to see, and maybe even some electrical power to lose but what else is new? Not much really, weather-related, and for that we're all very fortunate.
Rarely have we been subjected to tornadoes; occasionally to hurricanes; deluges and downpours rarer still; hailstones, we're more likely to get gallstones; avalanches and mudslides, as drinks and ice cream flavors, maybe. So we have to endure a little perspiration, well, maybe a lot, so what, consider the alternatives. I know, when you look outside and you can see the humidity, it's not very pleasant, but as the old saying goes, "It beats Bermuda off-season."
Even so, Bermuda off-season is a long way from what types of drastic weather residents in many, if not most, other parts of the country can expect yearly if not seasonally. So missing spring and jumping directly into summer, though disappointing, is hardly cause for complaints, really.
And those guilty by association, the meteorologists and/or weather forecasters shouldn't be belittled or disparaged because of our weather's unpredictability.
Predicting future weather, regardless of the new technologies or Almanacs at hand is tricky business. Mother Nature has a mind of her own (and may very well have her own agenda, too), and forecasting that future is hardly a straight line from their "computer models" to your neighborhood or to your weekend destination. And as much as Doppler radar on the ground or weather satellites in the sky are helpful, nevertheless, the reality is, predicting the weather is not an exact science nor is it simply adding facts and figures. If it were so easy, we wouldn't be talking about it all the time. So let's give credit where credit is due and not assign blame where none should be assigned. Whatever will be, will be.
Sure, the weather matters, but what matters more is whether or not we let it control our lives. And a little humidity never killed anyone, but expecting the weather to be something it's rarely been seems shortsighted and long-winded. So we missed spring, so what, there's always the fall to look forward to.

Lourie is a regionally syndicated columnist who resides in Burtonsville, MD.